“I am a Nigerian student living in Scotland, A Nigerian Christian guy got in touch with me via WhatsApp and asked for a relationship, saying he got my number off a church whatsapp group that I haven’t been to for almost a year now. He said he’s prayed about me and God has told him we are good to go. He is a student too.
I was single at the time and haven’t been with a Christian brother before, so I decided to give it a chance. It’s roughly 2 months and I am at the point where I want to quit.
We got talking on the platform and also through calls, about a week into our relationship/talking stage he asked me to come to his place and cook for him so he can have enough food for the coming week. I was surprised because we hadn’t even seen each other at that at time. I told him I cannot, he made a big deal out of it and said stuff like it’s not a big deal for me to do that as his wife to be. We got over that and arranged to see for the first time, he suggested my house and I said I don’t feel comfortable with either of us seeing for the first time in our houses and we finally concluded on a Bugger King outlet which isn’t far from my house. This didn’t go well with him tho.
We met for the first time and talked, after that he said he wanted to know my place as it isn’t far from Burger King. He came to my place and stayed in my bed till around past 10pm, he tried touching and kissing, I told him I wasn’t comfortable and he needed to leave because of time. He got annoyed said his intentions was to stay over at my place, he already told his housemate he isn’t coming back home and it’s so late now to go back. I told him I cannot allow him sleep at my house for the first time we’re meeting, I have a small single bed and you intentionally didn’t even say you’d sleep over before. He grudgingly left and dropped 3 packs of youghurt and a bag of unfried chips which I later discovered where all expired at the time he dropped them.
I told him about it and he made a mess out of the situation. He attends a pentecostal church and critisizes other churches, he doesn’t really believe in adult taking responsibility for their actions as the devil is most likely responsible for everything, we simply have to pray against the devil.
He’s asked for sex multiple times in less than 1 month, I stopped talking to him one time for about 2 weeks and we picked up again. He said he doesn’t have to penetrate, we can do every other things to satisfy our flesh. He said doing all that with him is the proof of my love for him which I have strongly disagreed. Sex isn’t a prove of love, we are adults and can have protected sex with anyone without loving them.
The only single thing I enjoy about him is that we communicate well, he talks a lot too and that makes our communication half argument, he finds fault in any little thing and blows it out of proportion. I have told him I don’t have strength for argument in marriage since we won’t be arguing over minute things that get him pissed off now.
Both of us have been getting multiple 12 hours night shifts from work and two nights ago, he asked me what he was going to eat when he gets home the following morning, I knew he was up to something. I told him I can’t say, we don’t live together and I don’t know what you currently have at home. I suggested he buys bread on his way back home. He then asked me to cook for him to eat the following morning, I sincerely let him know I have no soup or stew myself. His response changed and he later called me on same subject, citing how I don’t care enough about him to be concerned about how he is gonna eat since he’s been working few nights now, he compared himself to a married man that always brings food to work at his workplace. Even gave the guy his phone to talk to me, that one too said I should do things in my power to make my man happy.
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I tried to make him understand he isn’t married and it might be difficult to enjoy what his married frnd is enjoying. Youve never bought me foodstuff, you haven’t worked before and sent me 50 pounds or less for groceries, we are both working night shifts and I sort my own food, why are you angry I can’t make out time out of my rest period to come cook at your house to stuck your fridge?
I have been in relationship where I cooked, I personally enjoy cooking, but I have never been with a man that feels to entitled to me doing that for him. He says I’m supposed to be the one cooking for him. He also believes in women abroad sharing bills, but he is too traditional to share house chores”
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